Minesweeper

I don't usually play games. When I first start a game, I love it and spend hours on it. But after some time, I wonder, 'what's the point?' Yes, I will get coins or points so that my character will upgrade or I will go on to the next level. But what could those coins or points do in my real life? Does it give me anything real? Then I stop the game and turn off my phone/computer. I stare at the dead black screen and think, 'I just spent 2 hours staring at that screen.' I can't help but feeling I have just wasted 2 hours of my life. I regret thinking that I could have been much more productive.

Nonetheless, there is one game that I have been playing as long as I can remember. Minesweeper. My dad taught me how to play a long time ago and ever since, I've been playing it. Yes, there were times I stopped, maybe because I was too busy with some other addictive games like Candy Crush but I always went back to Minesweeper in the end. Last night, I don't know why, I just wanted to play it. Apparently Windows 10 doesn't have it installed automatically, so I had to download it. The graphics were so much different from what I remembered, but the rule was always the same. You click and numbers appear. Those numbers represent the number of mines around that one square and by deduction or guess you find those hidden mines. It was so fun, I couldn't stop. My boyfriend had to trick me into going somewhere else so that he could turn off the computer.

Later that night, I wondered why the game attracted me so much. I guess it was kind of like life itself. You don't know what you are going to face and you try not to hit the mine. You try to go around and make your way through by considering all the steps, based on probability sometimes. But in the end, there is always this one part where it is fifty fifty chance. You just have to believe in your luck. Sometimes you hit the mine when you are not careful but sometimes it's just the chance. I don't know anything else that can describe life more easily than this simple Microsoft game (for now at least. Since I am still young and there are so many things that I don't know yet). The only difference, I guess is that, you can play the same game over and over again to get it right in the end. That, however, applied to the real life, wouldn't be fun at all. 

So my point here is, Minesweeper ROCKS!

xx

Liz

I am back. Perhaps.

After spending around five hours reading the previous entries of my old blogs, here I am, adding another one to my favorite blog. So much has happened during the past two years, I honestly don't know where to begin. I guess I should talk about what I am doing now. I am writing. A big change, yes. But the strangest thing is that according to what I have written all these years, writing actually seemed to be what I wanted to do all along. So I guess my life turned out to be quite like I dreamed. Writing is something new though. It has only been around four months since I started writing so I don't really have much to show. I am currently working on a short movie script as well as some short stories. Hope they work out as I wish to.

Another change is that we don't live in Paris anymore. We moved so that we could be closer to my boyfriend's work. It is a much smaller city than Paris, but it has its perks: everything is very close since we live in the city center and I don't have to face the gloomy faces of Parisians in stinky métro anymore whenever I want to go somewhere. But it gets quite boring. I wish I could make some good friends and I am working on it. We will see.

I hope I can stick to posting on this blog. I struggled to remember my ID, not even my password, my ID, for God's sake. Two years is a long time I guess - besides I think I am getting old; I forget things constantly. 

꿈을 꾸었다. 꿈 속에서 나는 교도소 같은 곳에 갇혀 있었고, 너무나도 간절히 밖으로 나가고 싶어 했다. 내 방안에는 갓난아이가 있었고 곧 그 아이는 차가운 시체가 되었다. 아무 느낌도 들지 않았다. 그저 밖으로 나가고 싶었다. 문에는 창살이 달린 작은 유리창문이 있었고 나는 맨손으로 그 창문을 계속 쳤다. 나가고 싶었다. 살고 싶었다. 그 때 나는 그 작은 유리창문을 통해 어떤 여자를 보았다. 빨간 단발 머리의 여자. 뒷 모습 밖에 보이지 않았지만 그녀가 나에게 정말 중요한 사람이라는 걸 느낄 수 있었다. 그녀와 이야기를 해야 했다. 그러기 위해선 밖으로 나가야 했다. 하지만 문은 열리지 않았고 나는 잠에서 깨었다. 어쩌면 그녀는 내 미래의 자신이 었을지도 모른다는 생각이 들었다. 그 미래의 자신에게 닿으려고 안간힘을 쓰는 나의 현재 모습을 본 걸 수도 있다는 생각이 들었다. 나의 현실은 그렇게 힘들지 않은데, 왜 그런 꿈을 꾸었을까? 

Je bois du thé. C'est une nouvelle habitude. Tous les après-midi à vers 16H je fais bouillr l'eau et prépare mon thé. Quand mon thé est fini, mon amour rentre. 

La photo est prise chez nous. C'est notre troisième maison.

Bienvenu et à bientôt, peut-être. 

xx

Liz